


Memories

by AnouchkaK20XX



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Bottom Clint Barton, Clint taking care of Loki, Flashbacks, Fluff, Frosthawk - Freeform, Heartwrenching, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Past Torture, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Slow-ish burn, Top Loki (Marvel), You Have Been Warned, bc fuck you that's why, i guess?, this might fuck you up, this should have been the title tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-07-23
Packaged: 2019-06-14 21:27:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15397818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnouchkaK20XX/pseuds/AnouchkaK20XX
Summary: When the god of thunder and his brother come knocking at Tony's door seeking shelter after their planet was destroyed, Clint starts getting flashbacks from what had happened in New York a few years ago, when he was under Loki's mind control, and he's not sure whether he likes it or not.





	Memories

**Author's Note:**

> So basically, this happens in a setting where Thanos does not find the Asgardian ship at the end of Ragnarok, and while Bruce was immediately accepted into Stark tower a few days prior to the beginning of this story, the brothers had a little... difficulty finding their way to said tower, which is why Bruce is already there when they arrive. Hope that clears it up.

"Agent Barton."

 

The British accented voice immediately caught Clint's attention.

 

"Yes, sir?" He turned around to focus his attention on Loki, as usual.

 

"I will need you to clean these up for tomorrow. No excuses."

 

Loki handed him a bunch of various knives and daggers, and simply left the room while saying "This will be all."

 

"Yes, sir." replied Clint. There weren't that many knives, but the work was still tedious. Nevertheless, he started working on it since he had nothing else to do for the evening. He sometimes liked his new boss, but now was not one of those times.

 

Clint awakened with a jolt. Was it just a dream? Because if so, not only was it ridiculously precise, but also really out of context. He hadn't dreamt about New York for years, and now it suddenly decided to pop back into his head? No thank you. And that bastard...

 

Thinking about Loki, about how he was used by him to murder innocents and almost kill Natasha made his blood boil. It was hard enough to see him again in that dream, but it was even worse when, later that day, none other than the god of mischief himself, along with his brother, came knocking on Stark tower's door.

 

"Uh, yeah, no, you stay outside. The last time you were here, you broke my window - by no other means than THROWING ME THROUGH IT - and destroyed half my living room by getting thrown around by the Hulk, not to mention the space portal you placed on my roof."

 

Hawkeye couldn't help but smile to himself at Tony's banter. Of course he wouldn't let that psychopath inside. He had worried for nothing.

 

"Man of Iron, I know you do not hold my brother in your heart. But I do. And if you truly are my friend, you shall let him in. Please."

 

Tony grunted, meaning he couldn't think of anything to say, which was a bad sign for Barton.

 

"You're not playing fair, Thor... Just, just come inside, both of you. If I even catch a glimpse of him fooling around, I'm throwing both of you out. Understood?"

 

"Yes, of course." There it was. The dreaded voice with a British accent. Clint, however, was not ready to abandon and marched firmly towards the door.

 

"Wait a second, I-"

 

"Barton." The way Loki said his name sent shivers down his spine. He hated to admit it, but the experience he had been through affected him. He hadn't been able to sleep for weeks after that. Just like when the Maximoff kid died. He felt responsible. Guilty. The feelings had never gone away, they only faded, and Clint was not about to relive that nightmare just because Tony had a weak friendship with Thor and thought that letting this madman into his house would fortify the bonds.

 

"Loki. You're not welcome here, you know?" His tone was filled with cold rage, or so he hoped.

 

"I am afraid there are very few places where I am welcome. We would not have come here otherwise." There was no mocking in his voice, and if Clint didn't know better, he would even believe he was telling the truth.

 

"Yeah, I wonder why. Not like you blew up New York or anything. Using this building, above all things."

 

Tony took this opportunity to chime in.

 

"That's what I was saying! You blew shit up, you killed innocents, and now we're just supposed to welcome you like you're a part of the family?"

 

Loki only chuckled while softly shaking his head.

 

"Don't you think that's a bit hypocritical? I mean, you were making bombs that blew up innocents, and you dare lecture me for doing the exact same thing?" Tony's head snapped from the drink he was making to Loki's face.

 

"I know. But at least I've changed."

 

"So have I." replied Loki without missing a beat.

 

"I stopped making bombs to focus on clean energy. I have proved that I have changed for the better. Not you."

 

"Trust me, I will."

 

Tony smirked at the opportunity he had been given to take a jab at the god.

 

"See, that's the problem with you Loki. No matter what you'll do, no matter what you'll say, you will always be seen as the crazy asshole who tried to conquer the planet, because no matter what, nobody will ever trust you, nor believe in you." This time, the smile that was always on Loki's lips faded, and he stayed silent.

 

"Have care how you speak! My-"

 

"Then so be it." interrupted Loki quietly. It was almost always impossible to know what exactly he was thinking. Thor, unsure of what to say, changed the subject.

 

"Will you please show us to our rooms?"

 

Tony repeatedly looked at Thor, and then at Loki, before finally throwing his arms in the air as a sign of giving up.

 

"Follow me." commanded Tony while walking towards the guest rooms part of his tower, which is where Clint was, standing outside of his own room. When Loki passed by, Hawkeye shot him a look of disgust and hate. Loki's face stayed boringly blank, which annoyed Clint. He wasn't really expecting any other reaction, save for maybe a smirk that signified "I am superior to you and I know it", but it didn't stop him from hoping to one day get under his tormentor's skin. Tony continued guided Thor to a better then average bedroom.

 

"We sadly still have four vacant bedrooms, because apparently everyone thinks my place is a hotel." he explained, shooting a quick friendly glare at Barton.

 

"Here you go, and you, sir, will have the tiny room at the end of the corridor."

 

Loki chuckled before entering said room.

 

"Tiny? It's not that bad. Why would I need a lot of space?"

 

Tony rolled his eyes.

 

"Whatever, reindeer games. Just don't... do anything. Yeah, that would be just great, absolutely perfect."

 

"Sure." said Loki sarcastically before closing the room behind him. The least he saw him, the happier Clint was, so it was at least that.

 

"So, Thor," began Tony, "can you, uh, explain to me why a god prince or king or whatever who lives in a literal solid gold palace needs a place to stay? Why not just return to Asgard? I'm not saying that I'm clever or anything - which I am, I'm really intelligent -, but that just seems like a great idea. Don't you think so, Legolas?" Hawkeye didn't really mind the nickname, since he knew that was Tony's way of being friendly. Also, he thought Legolas was a badass archer, and compared to "Point Break" or "Reindeer Games", it was actually flattering to be compared to him.

 

"I really don't see any problem with that, Thor." The latter's lips curled up in a broken smile, and his voice was equally broken when he spoke.

 

"Yes, that's what I actually wanted to do, but..." He took a deep breath before continuing.

 

"Asgard is... gone."

 

Clint frowned, perplexed by his words.

 

"Gone? What do you mean, gone?"

 

"It was destroyed by the demon Surtur, which I intentionally released to stop my sister Hela, whom I just recently found out about, from conquering the universe."

 

"Couldn't you just... beat her?"

 

"I did. It was... the only way."

 

Hearing the sorrow in his voice, Clint decided to stop pressing the matter onto him. Tony did not.

 

"Any other murderous siblings we should know about?" Thor chuckled.

 

"I hope not. But, more seriously, Loki has changed. He even saved my life."

 

"Just because he saved your life once doesn't mean-"

 

"On multiple occasions. Even when he had nothing to gain from it."

 

Tony took a deep breath, obviously trying his hardest not to yell at Thor.

 

"Alright. Let's say that, for whatever reason, he changed sides. What prevents him from reversing again?"

 

"Family. Because I am the only one he has left. My father died, my mother died and my sister died - but she was an asshole, so that's okay -, and then, he passed up an opportunity to rule an entire planet just to be able to fight at my side once more, not even knowing if he would make it. Hel, I was unable to even stun her, and I was fully powered! Why would he risk his life for the one person he cares about only to throw it all away when he arrives on Midga- I mean Earth? It's not like he could conquer anything with his daggers, anyway, so you need not worry, for I am here to stop him if he tries anything - which he won't." he added when he noticed Tony was about to interrupt him.

 

"That was one hell of a monologue. Still doesn't make me trust him." Clint was not convinced at all. And even if he was, how could he ever forgive him for what he had done? "He was inside my brain. Do you know what that feels like?"

 

"Not to mention the... things he made me do. And the worst part is that I still can't remember exactly what I've done. I only know I killed people because I was told about it. Each time they talked about a dead agent, I couldn't help but wonder: was that me, this time? Was I the one responsible for his death? And I never knew, because they wouldn't tell me, and it drove me fucking mad! Without Nat, I... I honestly don't know where I'd be right now. Or if I'd be anywhere at all." Clint panted lightly while his friends looked at him with pain and shock in their eyes. Thor approached him and hugged him tightly.

 

"I am terribly sorry, Hawk Man. I had no idea." Thor pulled back and looked at him in the eyes, hands on his shoulders. "But just as you cannot hold anything against Natasha for her past crimes, you have to forgive Loki for his. I do not think even he can. Perhaps if you forgive him will you also be able to forget about him."

 

 

Oh, if only Thor had known how wrong he was.


End file.
